"The Subtle Art of Letting Go"
"What a waste of my got damn time!" I shouted, nearly at the top of my lungs as I threw my phone onto the bed in anger. The conversation I just had with my then girlfriend led to what I'll call a defining moment in my adolescence, wasn't pretty at all. Still occupying a room in my mother's home, I shut the door to get some privacy. We ended a relationship that lasted an eternity to me but in reality was just one short year of ups and downs. I paced around my room trying to allow the anger to subside. What went wrong? I'm tired of this crap. I mumbled to myself in a haughty attempt to make sense of things. Relationships can certainly bring out the best in us and in this case, also evoke serious emotional pain. I felt angry, frustrated and a barrage of other feelings. That day reminded me of why letting go is quite difficult to do but absolutely necessary if we plan to move forward in life in a healthy way. Holding on to past circumstances and experiences not only will keep you stuck but it'll also keep you from experiencing a life of freedom and liberty.
"Let it Burn"
More than just a great song by R&B legend Usher, letting it burn in my opinion is an integral part of letting go. In an attempt to avoid pain many of us cling tighter to dead end situations and circumstances. Apart of the healing process in life is allowing yourself to feel the sting of the closing a chapter in life to give way to a new beginnings. In other words to be able to experience growth we must not be afraid to walk the path of healing which in many cases contains uncomfortable feelings. Running from it only prolongs the process and further keeps us bound to that which we must release.
"Accepting what is"
Learning to see things for what they are authentically and experiencing life as it is, is my understanding of acceptance. The more we push for what we wish would have been the case only prevents us from moving forward. There are things we simply cannot change no matter how badly we wish things we different. Each one of us faces moments each day where we are presented with an opportunity to practice acceptance. These moments don't always have to be big gut wrenching situations. For example the other day I had my mind set on some left over chicken wings from The Outback. My mouth watered as I reached for the refrigerator handle. My anticipation slowly turned to sheer horror when I could not find the black to go container I left on the second ledge. I shuffled items around frantically as my blood pressure boiled slightly. In the corner of my eye I could see something sticking out of the trash can on the other side of the kitchen. It was the container I was looking for and when I examined it closely I discovered only remnants of the chicken remained. My first inclination was to look for someone to blame. I stood there with my face scrounged up, armed with a slew of complaints. I stopped in my tracks and questioned if I really needed to harp on this. I laughed to myself and accepted they were gone. Talk about a lesson in acceptance. faced with two options, I could have pouted or I could accept it and get something else to eat. I chose the latter. I got over it and moved on. It happens, It's apart of this life that we are all blessed to live.
"The Take Away"
Think of how you could be holding yourself back today. Is there a situation you've been mulling over in your mind and debating whether you should walk away? Is there an unhealthy friendship, love relationship or situation standing in the way of your happiness? The longer we hold on, the more pain we cause ourselves in the long run. It is my hope that you'd be encouraged today as each of us finds the courage and strength to live our best lives. Everyone of us are faced with choices each day. These choices directly play in role in happiness and stability. Choose you today. Choose happiness and dare to see life change right before your eyes. Let it go. You know what it is. Take a deep breathe and feel the weight of the world lifting off of your shoulders. I'll leave you with a quote today. "Holding on is believing that there is past; letting go is knowing that there is a future."—Daphne Rose Kingma