Shameless

I sat my phone down at the corner of my desk. My fingers dribbled along the edge as I processed what had just occurred. My ears burned from the lamentations. To put it as frankly as I can, some people don’t understand how absurd they appear. Being a chronic victim is not a badge of honor. People who pretend to care to mask their wants are disingenuous. When did blaming others for the bed they’ve made make them noble? I’ve always prided myself on being able to avoid or limit contact with people like this, but there are times they slip through the cracks. Just because we love someone doesn’t mean we have to deal with their unsavory behavior.

Answering the phone blindly while deeply entrenched in my writing wasn’t something I should’ve done. I should’ve ended the call as quickly as it began. Hindsight is twenty-twenty. How do we deal with the people in our lives who never have anything good to say? How do we manage our relationships with people who treat others poorly by consistently taking more than they give, using others with reckless abandon, all while claiming to be the perpetual victim? They’re shameless.

I used to answer the phone when I should’ve blocked them. I’d let people talk when I should’ve interrupted them and ended the interaction. I don’t have time for drama and foolishness in my life. This was an important lesson that I had to learn. Now more than ever it’s important to enforce boundaries. Protecting our minds is of the utmost importance, which means we must be selective with the energy we allow into our lives. You can’t be concerned with how they’ll take it, especially if you’ve already shared how you’ve felt. Shameless folks don’t appear to have social awareness. I’m all for giving people a chance, but there comes a time when you’ve said everything that can be said. Accountability doesn’t always feel good. Making excuses for friends and family who continue to violate your boundaries has to come to an end.

Today, I ask you to consider your feelings. Are there people you’ve been continually extending grace to with no change in behavior? How you feel matters. It’s time to make your well-being a priority and it starts with defining your personal boundaries. Once they’re defined they will govern how you interact with the people in your life and will also help you determine what you will and will not accept from others. The truth is not easy to share, but it must be spoken. It’s okay to be selective in regards to the people you choose to have around you. This chapter of your life is about peace; it’s okay to make it about you for once.