Beautifully Imperfect

I took my seat amongst a horde of anxious travelers. The cramped Boeing jet was destined to become my office for the next few hours. Domestic first-class flights are often nothing special, but I was thankful for the upgrade. I could feel the tension in my back as I squirmed in my seat searching for the perfect position of comfort. With TSA, delays, and crowds behind me, I planned to get some writing done before boarding was complete, but with all of the commotion, it was difficult to channel my thoughts, let alone write. For some reason, I didn’t feel settled. My neural pathways were dominated by made-up to-do lists and a sea of unfinished tasks.

Distracted, my eyes were drawn to a brother who struggled through the aisle totally oblivious of the people he hit with his oversized duffel bag. Damn, people can be so careless, I thought to myself. A few rows behind me, I could hear a woman arguing with the flight attendant for being told to keep her mask above her nose. Across the aisle, there was a toddler screaming as his embarrassed parents attempted to soothe his nerves. The orchestra of chaos was oddly an accurate reflection of how turbulent life could become at a moments’ notice: there’s always something going on.

Life’s fragility is an ever-present source of anxiety; people do their best to keep it together. Cheap thrills mask how most of us feel. Authenticity, these days, feels fleeting. Today, just one poorly timed mistake can seemingly ruin it all. One bad decision has the potential to haunt us for the rest of our lives. It’s difficult to shake the constant stream of negativity. The virus rages on with no end in sight. The growing irritation and discomfort amongst society is an ever-present thorn. There’s a war between the vaccinated and the unvaccinated that’s heating up by the day. People are struggling and looking for answers. With conflict and tragedy bubbling on every corner, how do we cope? How do we thrive when the cards feel so stacked against us? Where’s the peace?

I closed my eyes and took a sip of water. My untamed thoughts fueled my growing unrest. The flight attendants began making their final pre-departure announcements as the last few passengers took their seats in the back. With the cabin door now closed, the aircraft was set to begin being slowly being pushed from the gate. Time moved in slow motion. After what felt like an eternity we were now soaring above the puffy cumulus clouds leaving the beautiful city of Washington, D.C. behind.

The vibrant evening sky resembled a Van Gogh painting. An assortment of pinkish-orange hues captured my eyes. The glow from my window caused me to squint as I savored the moment. Most people had already begun to settle in and the only sound that could be heard was the low-end rumble of the engines that powered us through the sky. Strangely, it was at this moment, it became abundantly clear to me that we must silence the noise in life if we’re to think and process our thoughts clearly. The stress and chaotic soundbites dissipated once I settled in. Taking a step back to regroup is paramount these days. It’s in these moments we find our stride. I laughed to myself for forgetting such a simple but impactful lesson. It’s hard to focus when the stress starts to get the best of me. Perhaps you can relate. I began to feel the sense of peace that was once missing.

When you feel yourself losing it in the moment, remember to silence the noise. That could mean taking a walk and getting yourself to an environment where you can think without distraction. It could mean going into an empty bathroom stall and standing there for a few minutes to catch your breath. Maybe silencing the noise for you is going for a drive with the radio off to process your feelings and thoughts.

Anxiety, the unwanted companion, finds strength during moments of instability and uncertainty. Please don’t for any moment feel bad for struggling with it. Our human experience is riddled with uncomfortable moments, trials, and circumstances that seek to throw us off balance. Take your time today. You’re worth the effort of finding a moment of zen. Even just for a moment, I believe silence helps us process what we’re facing. While we are imperfect beings feeling our way through life, I must say we’re beautiful. Despite our limitations, challenges, and circumstances, we are beautiful. You’re beautiful. May we continue to move forward through life with our heads held high.